The famiLy hAd sTartEd to play whist. On the first round young Colin had been dealt a wonderful hand with lots of high cards. Colin had difficulty remaining calm and picked up a decorative yacht cleat, to help him maintain his composure. As the game progressed, Colin took trick after trick, all the while exuding elate as his smile widened with each card he played.
"This won't be An easy Task foR you, Roland" , said his boss, "you'll have to work double time for the rest of the week". "But you did grant me leave of absence to take my driving test tomorrow." "Well, I've revoked that now as this job requires a lot of graft, and you're the only one who can do it", growled his boss. "But I can pull some strings and get you booked in for your test next week", his boss said more sympathetically.
This is my 11-year-old Granddaughter's version:
Lauren Ames works aT the local cafĂ©. Monday is the loudest because the cappuccinos are fifteen percent off, but Wednesday is noisy too because the baker, Katie, always drops off brownies! Mrs Olmes is a frequent visitor and you always know when she arrives because the bell rings on the door and she would call out, “Hello, all!”. She would always order a banana split.
This is my version:
It is LiTtle known that, whilst Sir Ernest Rutherford is credited with first splitting the atom, it was in fact done by accident by his wife. Sir Rutherford had gone out to play golf and his wife was cleaning the house. Whilst in his laboratory she found it very noisy in there - she wanted to hear the sound of the brush on the floor. So she switched off his equipment and did the cleaning in peace and quiet. As she left the room, she switched the equipment back on. What she didn't know was that, as the equipment started back up, an atom or two of nitrogen split. Sir Rutherford was none the wiser about the event when he returned from golf. It took him another 10 days before he achieved the same, though he did realise what he had done and published the paper explaining this significant find and rightfully gaining the credit for it.
AfTER last week's minor disaster, when the car refused to steer anymore, Frank refused to get behind the wheel of his car. "I've always said you're a coward, Frank - that's truer now than ever", remarked Betty, "The garage has repaired the car and it's as good as new now". Frank was so aggravated by Betty's comments that he told her to get into the passenger seat. He got into the driving seat, adjusted the tuner to play hardcore punk music and drove determinatively to the Tower of London. He pulled up by the Yeoman Guard entrance, got out and spoke to the shocked and alert Yeoman Warders. "I want you to lock this woman up for a week to teach her a lesson", he said, pointing towards Betty. The Yeoman Warders relaxed somewhat, and told Frank that they don't do that any more, asking him to drive away quickly before he got booked for illegal parking!
NAthan wEnt into his garden determined to get his tree added to the place he had assigned it. He worked most of the day, but at last he got the aspen tree planted. As he stood to admire his work he rubbed his back that by now ached. "Aiyee - it's done", he rejoiced as he headed to the annex to put his feet up and have a well-earned cuppa.
This is my 11-year-old Granddaughter's version:
“Come on, this ancient artifacture must be worth a fortune! You must be mad to not want to sell it,” Mr Harrows said to Mrs Rosas. A few days ago, Mrs Rosas was digging in her vegetable garden when her spade hit something hard. Puzzled and curious, she bent down and started brushing the dirt off. She uncovered an old golden plate, rusted and filled with great detail. It was so intricate and precious, Mrs Rosas called over her good friend, Mr Harrows. “It would fill me with mirth to see this shabby old place redone with the costs, you could have it painted and get new equipment with money to spare!” He said gesturing her lounge and kitchen, a small, uninviting place where the walls peeled and the stove was practically falling apart. They walked down to the firth, and watched the rough Cornish sea crash down on the rocks. “You know, not everybody wants wealth, Mr Harrows. And I shall keep this so called ‘treasure’ as a souvenir,” Mrs Rosas said thoughtfully. Just then, some kids came running by. “Hey! You found our plastic treasure for drama club!” One said. “Yeah, Alex threw it over the fence the other day and we didn’t know where it landed!” Alex Threshhold lived next door to Mrs Rosas. Suddenly everything made sense, and Mrs Rosas punched Mr Harrows on the back playfully. “I told you!”, were her only words.
This is my version:
Was The plan to tRansfer his home going to be worth it? Living down by the coast was harsh, especially in Winter. So the decision was made and the house was transferred to a barge and carefully towed up the firth and relocated onto its new site. The job was completed and, with great mirth, the family celebrated.
ThE veg box deliveRy had been put away in its location and one by one the household headed to bed. There was no noise left in the house apart from his gentle breathing. But he swore he heard a really quiet sound as well and he felt compelled to investigate. Inside the veg box store a small eruption was talking place as one of the mushrooms was sending spore up into the air.
For some strange reason, it was always lively and noisy at what should have been a dull boring biennial chino union meeting. The keynote speech by calmed things down again, with everyone judging it to be of just the right length!
ALlison wAs out for a walk in an unfamiliar part of her village and its surrounding. Through a hedge she caught site of three chins down low, grazing the grass. She had to investigate, though the only chance to see what was in the field meant standing on a patch of unstable loamy soil. She gradually sunk into the mud pile feeling quite undignified. The owner of the field had a secretive chuckle as he offered Allison a hand to get up out of her predicament. Do you want to come and see my herd of Llama. You can feed them some of this hay - they go rather crazy about having it. Alison finished up having a splendid day after the initial setback.
On ThurRsday it was always noisy, though usually good natured. But tonight there was a particularly rowdy crowd in and trouble seemed close by. When they placed orders for excessive alcohol, the proprietor took charge and the rowdy crowd were evicted under much protest.
ThE noise from the engine sounded like trouble was brewing. He knew there was a problem with the fan belt but it had never been an issue of this magnitude before. There was nothing for it but to head to the local garage and get it seen to. Where the money was coming from he'd have worry about later.
Les was a radio ham. Depending on who he was in touch with, his loudspeakers might be noisy, or if the signal was very lossy it would fade then return and Les would miss bits of the conversation. Then one day, nothing was working well, so Les had to check all the connections. Eventually, he found a lousy bit of soldering on a vital bit of his kit. He was amazed at how this had never been a problem before. Out came his soldering equipment and before long some clear signals were coming through on his equipment.
Annabel looked aT thE shabby walls in her appartment. "Should I wallpaper them, or paint them? If it's paint, should it be gloss or matte?" Decisions, decisions - definitely time for a cup of tea.
Humpty Dumpty was fed up with having to be carefuL about Everything he did because of his fragile condition. Today, he thought he'd liven things up somewhat and found a nearby wall to sit on. To begin with, all was going ok, but the wall top was not very level and before long, poor humpty had a great fall. There were lots of the King's soldiers hanging around and they rushed to the scene. But, sad to say, they couldn't reassemble poor Humpty. (They didn't have superglue in those days you see.)
NormaLly, thE neighbourhood didn't mind the noise of the bell ringing practice from the local church tower. The bells would blend in nicely with the other noises of the village. But some people would get upset when the band of bell ringers practiced the funeral knell.
Paul had bEen Revelling in a rather seedy bar and emerged into the daylight nursing his femur that had suffered a bruise when two customers had started fighting. He staggered home and had a bowl of cereal and kefir, flopping onto the couch when he'd finished.
Ash was the younger of a father's two sons. Ash had a wild streak in him and didn't fancy his father's lifestyle. Boldly he asked for his portion of his estate and once he had converted it to cash, he headed off to a far country, enjoying himself with riotous living. Once his cash had run out, and a famine had struck that country, he found himself doing the filthy job of feeding swain, yet still being famished. Eventually he hung his head in shame and went back to his father's place wanting only to be counted among the servants since he'd at least get fed that way. He'd done with the life of a nomad. His father saw him approaching and ran to him, throwing his arms around him and welcoming him back, not as a slave, but as his son. [See Luke 15 11-32 in the Bible]
The stony path led South. What lay in wait for him there? He was not sure of a good welcome, but South he had to go.
The downpour was very noisy on the tinny roof of the village hall so they paused the film projection evening and handed round the ice creams. Before long there was a lovely minty smell in the air - they only had one type of ice-cream. Then the rain eased and they could restart the film.
It was LAshing down with rain so Sally made for the nearest restaurant and ordered some tomato and basil soup which went down really well. But to her surprise, her nasal passages then swelled and she had to breathe through her mouth. It was going to be difficult to find out the allergen that had caused this, because the supermarket versions of this dish caused no problems.
At thE annual feast of Shavaot (Pentecost) the followers of Yeshua (Jesus), who had recently been executed, but then came back to life, were in a house in Yerushalayim (Jerusalem) when suddenly it got very noisy, like a violent wind, as the Ruach HaKodesh (the Holy Spirit) filled them. Together they started speaking in all sorts of languages, telling of all the great things God had done. People from all over rushed to the scene, startled at the noise and the sight of what appeared to be flames resting on all the followers. Even the group from Hibernia stopped playing their gigue and gathered around with the thousands of others. Eventually Peter spoke to the crowd and explained that the Holy Spirit had come to imbue them with the power and ability to speak in the multitude of languages that had so shocked the majority of the crowd. [Read more in Acts 2 from the Bible.]
As "Death In Paradise" opens, we see a Luxurious spAcious house bathed in gloRious sunshine in a rural setting. A lone figure holding his towel walks towards the dwelling, with an isolated coral beach in the background. As he nears the house, there's a piercing scream. He rushes in the direction of the scream to see the window cleaner transfixed by the sight of (well you've probably guessed!) a dead body.
ARchie saw a whole array of alien spaceships heading towards earth. "Oh, no, not again", he said with a groan, as he put on his ear protectors and shades and pulled out his megablaster ignifier energy zapper. There was a lot of noise and light for a couple of minutes, then all went quiet and Archie settled back into his armchair. The next day there were news reports of an unexpected meteor shower!
Phoebe looked ouT of the window and jumped back in astonishment. "I could have sworn I saw an elephant outside", she said to Lucas. Lucas took a look and retorted - "that's far too short for an elephant". Together they had another look and agreed it was a stork. The stork looked at them, waved with its wing, then strode off round the corner and out of sight.
It was pitch daRk outside. Making his way through the forest was a nightmare, but he had to keep going. All of a sudden, a string of lanterns approached, making him stop in his tracks. As they approached, he could make out the robes and hoods. The quiet mumbling of the group seemed quite noisy compared to the quiet forest he'd been in. What was this grove of druid people doing? He was rigid with terror as they came to within a dozen yards of him. Then the 'druids' threw back their hoods, got out their barbeque equipment and set to to have a jolly meal, sing songs and tell jokes to each other. He relaxed and crept away, guided by the light of the druid's campfire, reaching his destination without mishap.
"What's aLl this noisy racket?", asked Mum. "The custard was very lumpy and I'm trying to make it smoother", replied Lois.
AnThony, still jingling the coins in his pocket, and starting once more to vaunt his handyman credentials, despite his recent setback (see 1508 - HAUNT) , had been hired to clear the gutters of the big house in the village. The sight of the 3-storey house didn't seem to daunt him, but when he approached with a ladder to tackle the job, the hirer reprimanded him explaining how dangerous tackling such a job from a ladder would be and fired him before he even started. Anthony still had a lot to learn!
Old Arthur's scion had deserted him years ago. Arthur sighed as he sat in the settee, picking up a nacho to nibble and turning on the TV. To his astonishment, there he was, his long-lost son, playing the banjo and looking very jolly. Arthur had a brighter day than he'd anticipated.
LoRraine shut the window because of the noisy road drill outside. Now she could turn her whole attention to adjusting the frill on her ladyships ball gown.
